This Is Not A Pity Memoir by Abi MorganSynopsis: “A moving memoir from the award-winning screenwriter and playwright Abi Morgan about what happens when the person you love most no longer recognizes you. One afternoon, Abi Morgan returned home to find her long-time partner and father to their two kids collapsed on the bathroom floor. Jacob, who had been undergoing treatment for multiple sclerosis, had suddenly experienced a series of seizures and had to be put into a medically induced coma. As he slowly regained consciousness after six months, he made tentative steps to communicate with those around him, and grappled with the host of issues that had been triggered by the damage caused to his brain. But while Jacob recognized his family and friends, he didn’t believe that the Abi standing in front of him—who had sat by his hospital bed, juggled care of their children, and liaised with his slew of doctors as he slipped between life and death—was in fact his Abi. Instead, he saw a woman whom he believed to be an imposter. Starting with Jacob’s first collapse and set over the course of two years since, This Is Not a Pity Memoir is a story about love and family. Abi describes with unflinching honesty and nuance the extraordinary and terrifying challenge of caring for a loved one in the wake of devastating illness. The book asks: How do you bring back someone who relies on you for recovery and yet no longer recognizes you? How do you reckon with the shared years that came before? And most of all: How do you navigate this new life together?”

 My Review

I really enjoyed this abridged version of Abi Morgan’s memoir that I listened to via the BBC Sounds App.

I first came across this book on Kate Mosse’s YouTube Channel Mosse on a Monday, back in 2022. I remember being instantly intrigued as I do enjoy memoirs, especially when she said how much she’d enjoyed it, and that although it was heartbreaking it wasn’t depressing.

I added it to my Goodreads and StoryGraph shelves but later removed it as I changed mind. It was when I was looking on the BBC Sounds App last month for audiobooks that it caught my eye again, and I decided to take the plunge.

This version is only 1 hour 45 minutes, compared to the full version at over 7 hours. It’s read brilliantly by Nicola Walker, who I loved as the co-narrator of None of This is True by Lisa Jewell.

I loved how honest Abi Morgan was about the situation all the way through, especially when Jacob refuses to accept who she is, seeing her as an imposter! I can’t imagine what that would feel like when you’ve been in a relationship with someone for a long time, including having children with them, and then that happens. What an nightmare scenario!

It was a heartbreaking listen, but also funny and hopeful as Jacob is slowly recovering.

Highly recommend on audio, especially if you enjoy memoirs.

Book 9 of 20 Books of Summer 2024